Series 25, episode 18

Sparks fly on Mr Robson’s wedding day.

28 March 2002, repeated 30 and 31 March 2002, 5 March and 13 August 2003

“Let the world know exactly what kind of man is taking over the reins”

Content warning for implied violence, terrible CGI, and for great balls of fire.

Martin and Max and Kathy and Ben wait outside the school grounds, plotting to put the truth about Deverill, or Wilcox, or whatever his name is.

Kathy flatters Mr. Deverill, promises a website article about the new headteacher. Deverill trusts her, and hands over the keys to the computer room.

So, what’s Chris and Kieron’s plan? Counterfeit notes, Cracker’s to drop them off at Macca’s scrap metal yard, and will be paid £500 for his troubles. Except that Kieron’s switched the parcel, replacing the counterfeit notes with an identical package he prepared earlier. Bit late to audition for Blue Peter?

Cracker turns up at the scrap car yard, and hands over the package. It’s a pile of blank paper. Cracker runs away from the men, but is saved when Kieron turns up.

Kieron spins a yarn about Chris being worried that Macca had talked to the cops, and that’s why Chris sent the blank notes. Meet him at the club, they suggest. So they go off to the club, where Chris finds a note “What goes around, comes around”, and the piles of fake £50 notes. And in come three coppers to nick the lot of them.

“The chemical cupboard is the safest place I can think of”, says Mr. Hankin, who will be Mr. Robson’s best man. That’s where he’s hidden the rings. They pass Max and Ben and Ian and Rob from the independent school, who are hiding in the car park.

Mr. Hankin insists on putting the chemicals back in the cupboard, but Mr. Wilcox-Deverill-thingy insists the chaps go – he’ll lock up and they can put the chemicals away later.

Mr. Robson turns up late for the wedding, a neat reversal of the traditional roles. “Let’s get married,” replies Miss Carver.

Vikki and Briony have a talk, during which Briony’s bag spills open. It’s got sweets and crisps in it, television code for crap food. Briony can’t talk about what’s going on.

Matt has twigged what’s going on, how Briony’s making herself throw up, to feel better about herself.

The happy couple turn up in school, for a small and intimate meal, organised by Carl. The curtains drop to reveal all of the pupils, and there are speeches from Miss Fraser and Mr. Hankin.

After that, Ian has a quiet word with Mr. Deverill. “Kathy’s got a problem: should she file you under D or W. For Wilcox. Stephen Wilcox.” A face like thunder, as his secret is rumbled.

Kathy is quietly working in the computer room, and publishes “Deverill / Wilcox? You decide” on the screens. Mr. Devewilcox enters the room, fuming like smoke’s coming out of his nostrils, and raises his hand to strike Kathy. Ian and Ben follow, with Mr. Robson seeing it all.

And the evidence just keeps coming. Ian tells of how he was struck the once, and then Rob from the private school enters. “Sacked for violent conduct… you make me feel worthless.” Devewilcox’s response? “You weren’t bad. You were pathetic. I should have hit you harder.” Mr. Robson has heard enough.

Devewilcox is put into the PRF, a room for “quiet reflection”. Except… he’s still got his keys, and lets himself out of the PRF. Heading to the headmaster’s office, he collects incriminating papers and puts them in a bin. He prepares to burn them… and notices the smoke alarm.

Turning the school’s fire alarm off, Devewilcox lights his fire and prepares to make good his escape. But Vikki and Kieron are rowing in the corridor outside, leaving Devewilcox to exit through the window. And in the unguarded office, the draught from the open window fans the flame and it catches his second suit…

Ian’s going to get his army reference. Cracker tells Tom that Lisa fancies him something rotten, and they talk and they kiss.

Mr. Robson tells his new wife that he’s staying for another year. Briony opens her soul to Matt.

And the fire has spread, out of the head’s office and into the chemical lab.

And Kieron and Vikki are still rowing, how Kieron does everything himself, and how all he wants is Vikki. It’s the deep kiss they’ve been leading up to for the whole series.

Ian and Max have alerted Mr. Robson to the escaped Devewilcox, and they stumble on the fire. Mrs. Robson breaks the fire alarm with her shoe, but nothing happens. Tom and Lisa stumble pass the place, and shout “Run!” at Vikki and Kieron.

And then, in a spectacularly bad CGI effect even by 2002 standards, a fireball leaps out of the chemistry lab and instantly engulfs the whole building. Windows are blown out, though the flames somehow don’t affect the benches just outside.

Si Spencer wrote, Mark Sendall directed.

Music: “High” by The Lighthouse Family as Miss Carver prepares… “Dancing in the moonlight” by Toploader as Ian ambushes Devewilcox… At the party: “Mambo number 5” by Lou Vega… “Life is a rollercoaster” by Ronan Keating… “True” by Spandau Ballet… “Groovejet (if this ain’t love)” from Spiller and Sophie Ellis Bextor… “Everlasting love” by The Love Affair … “Sexbomb” by Tom Jones.

The series ends here. I’ll be back next week, to wrap up the 2002 series, and the 1994-2002 era as a whole.